I get lost in thought. 

A lot. 

I’m usually sitting at my fire escape window, smoking, thinking about the big ideas.  The big concepts that we all grapple with -  that seem to stand in direct contrast to the brass tacks reality that as an individual I am a speck in the great vastness of time and space.  And thats just it right?  That we are at once totally insignificant and also capable of impacting great change and feeling SO MUCH.  That we are each intrinsically prepackaged with an energy that has the power to create and to destroy.  

A sensation/feeling/visualization that frequently, FREQUENTLY, washes over me is one in which my mind is so overcome by an image, a song, a thought or emotion that I visualize my body just… vaporizing.  Exploding.  Exploding into a million teeny tiny pieces.  

It’s not that I daydream about exploding all the time. haha.  

I’m just constantly chipping away at the idea that, as a human being, you can be so overcome and consumed by an emotion or a thought, that the connective tissues, the cells, the atoms that make up your solid physical state reach a sort of critical mass and can no longer hold your consciousness in.  I think this is something that humans have agonized over for a long time.  The connection and tension between our physical selves and our eternal spirit.  That’s where art comes in.  A means of getting these thoughts out, lest they tear us apart.

Through my work, I endeavor to explore and illustrate these thoughts, these emotions, these moments… that are so often elusive to the written word.  The boiling over of thoughts that make you want to run a marathon or bash your head into the wall.  The fine line between creation and self-destruction and how magical they BOTH can feel.

I explore these things through the scope of my own lens and for this reason, a lot of my art is autobiographical.   I know that some will relate fully and others won’t.  

But regardless, I will continue to visually represent the perils and beauty of being human via my personal artistic brand and personal experiences.  

And eventually I’ll figure out a way to draw myself exploding.